Should you quit your day job and go on tour with a rock band?

That’s the question answered by cellist Zoe Keating at Ignite, the 5-minute hyperpresentation series put on by O’Reilly. (At an NYC event, I gave a talk explaining why understanding basic programming concepts was as important as calculating your tip on a bill.)

Zoe Keating on Should you join a rock band? [Ignite's Brady Forrest]

Zoe debunks the myth of the glamorous tour with some sobering realities with which I’m sure at least some readers here are already far too familiar. The presentation is snappy, sharp, and more than occasionally hilarious, a perfect Igniter.

If that’s got you down, though, the same post points to this brilliant “Quantum Cello” piece in which Zoe explains how she works with loops, blending electronic techniques with a 17th-century instrument. That’s the kind of old meets new sensibility we love. And by the way, when Zoe tours with a rock band, she does have good taste — she hit the road with the Dresden Dolls’ fabulous Amanda Palmer.

Quantum Cello, WNYC Radio Lab [Audio podcast / interview]

Something has happened with electronic musicians and producers. We’re not confined to the ghetto of electronic sounds any more. You could argue it’s a sign of waning interest in those timbres, but I think it’s something else: people are simply becoming more flexible creative producers, comfortable with acoustic and electrified and synthesized sounds alike.

So, in that spirit, one of my most anticipated albums of this year has been one that’s mostly instrumental and not-terribly-electronic or digital. It’s the March release Saskamodie from Mocky, Somali-Canadian-Yemeni musician. I’ve just begun listening to it, and I’m quite enjoying it. It’s definitely retro, a groovy, poppy reverie that seems more than a little inhabited by the soul of Serge Gainsbourg, who once recorded in the studio in which it was recorded. It’s also effective partly because it fits squarely into the realm of jazz. It oozes warmth and humor, sonically and musically.

In the meantime, Mocky himself has shown us how to market effectively with tongue planted firmly in cheek, as seen in the video above. It’s a dangerous maneuver to attempt – trained professionals only. But by invoking some digital effects and a heavy dose of hyperbole, Mocky I think manages to strike a balance between self-promotion and self-deprecation.

He has some help from his friends, too: collaborators Jamie Lidell, Feist, Gonzales, Kevin Blechdom, and Peaches show up. That lineup puts Mocky in with a crowd that embodies a growing retro-savvy aesthetic. I actually don’t think that “retro” has to even carry any negative connotations. Done poorly, of course, an album can simply seem backwards-looking or out of place – but that’s true anyway. Done well, we have a new sense that time can fold in on itself, that in an age of digital recordings, we share musical space virtually, even with musicians who are now very dead. And maybe that’s the zeitgeist this video unwittingly touches.

After all, at worst, we live in an age that could be a simple, cheap digital effect – the kind being (cough) mocked here. We could paste ourselves onto old musical styles, and look just as awkward as a couple of the motion-tracked faux heads floating on the bodies of drummers of the past. Happily, I don’t find that that’s the case here. Mocky has a comfort and sensibility that somehow hints that it’s 2009, but perhaps 2009 doesn’t have to be 2009.

That said, I’d still like to hear more envelope-pushing in these retro directions. Sure, it’s fun channeling Serge Gainsbourg, but I don’t hear people challenging someone really tough, like bleeding-edge Miles Davis. The styles we cherish so much came out of real experimentation. Maybe that’s a challenge for myself as much as for the albums on my listening queue. Nonetheless, Mocky’s mock-marketing and self-branding is as suave as his music, and Saskamodie is like an easy-to-drink, expensive port – a dessert drink, but a delicious one.

You can download the new album from the label, Crammed Discs.

http://www.mockyrecordings.com

Thanks to Tobias Thon for this one (via Facebook).

Okay, first, a disclaimer: the fact that the upcoming microKORG XL has a “genre” knob for selecting presets isn’t big news. The original microKORG had genre-selectable presets, too. The beauty of the original, though, was how incoherently these settings were labeled. (Retro, or Hiphop/Vintage, anyone?)

Sometimes, the labels that don’t fit are better than the real ones.

“What type of music do you play?”

“I play VOCODER!”

(From here on out, any time the mention of VOCODER comes up, it shall be in CAPS and ITALICS as will anything else we especially ENJOY. For instance: GRANULAR DISTORTION!)

Sadly, it seems Korg has – well, sort of – made these choices rational. (As rational as they can be, anyway, given “genre” is generally irrational.) I think I misread the label “ROCK/POP” as “POWER POP” – you’ll have to use your imagination. (VINTAGE SYNTH? Does that really say HOUSE/DISCO?) Korg explains:

The first selects the musical genre, while the second defines the instrument category. From the familiar "ROCK / KEYBOARD," the standard "R&B / LEAD," and the distinctive "HIPHOP / BASS," a wide range of presets are instantly available. For the diehard synthesists and sound designers, you can use the three performance edit knobs for fast, effective editing in performance. You’re also free to select and assign your favorite parameters.

No idea what “distinctive” means, but since our job is not selling lots of gear, let’s do something more fun. I suggest we chip in and imagine the Most Awesomest Genre Knob ever. You’ll be free to incorporate this into your Pd and Reaktor patches. It will have silly, awesome names on it that we’ve made up or refer to disparagingly. Get your genre brains going, and submit your ideas, and I’ll run the best answers later this week. You’ll have to print out a sticker to put on your new microKORG XL when it ships in 2009.

Now, if only we could use a “genre” knob on bands at gigs… sorry, Emo band, you’ve now just become Avant-electro-noise!

Send your answers below, or head directly to http://cdm.genreknob.sgizmo.com

If this economy is getting you down, our friends at MeatWater, the “high-efficiency survival beverage,” have a prescription. A prescription for techno:

MeatWater MP3 Techno Remix

Now, perhaps this is just a crass ploy for MeatWater to sell more of their MeatWater-protein drinks, which come in flavors like Gyros, Beef Stroganof, Hungarian BBQ, and Dirty Hot Dog. But if there’s one thing I believe in more than the health-giving power of proteins, it’s in the stimulating power of techno. I’m steps away from the stock market, so I may take this on a boom box and hold it out front of the exchange, Say Anything-style. Well, until I get stopped.

I mean, who can feel anything but bullish as four beats pound confidently on the … floor?

By the way, if you’re wondering, just … don’t. There’s not really a rational explanation.

You can talk to the bottles on Twitter. They like German. (send them some German techno, okay?)

I can’t say anything this song doesn’t say brilliantly. Comedian Adam Buxton takes on the Radiohead remix contest with his own entry, which cuts through the hype brings a bit of wit to TV incidental music and remixing alike. And, really, how often do you get to say "Radiohead" and "rap" in the same sentence? Take my mechanical rights, please!

See, there, I said something. It wasn’t very good. Just so listen to the song and thank me later, okay?

See also Adam Buxton’s sketch for BBC3’s Rush Hour which cleans up NWA to "Help Da Police." Thanks, Jaymis!

In fairness, this isn’t really off-topic. The connection of ladies to music is clear here. There are, too, the fantastic Ladies of CDM — few in number, yes, but mind-bogglingly awesome in quality. (Ladies, feel free to roar here.) And, of course, for those of you who are not ladies yourselves but an aficionado of ladies, it’s clear that, like roller skates, synths and music are part of the essential lady-attracting formula.

The bad news I have to break for Flight of the Conchords fans:you’ll be waiting until well into 2009 for a new season.

Side note: CDM loves New Zealand.

Since it’s now April 2, the music technology April Foolishness has been revealed for what it is.

Composer/educator Steve Horelick provided a sneak glimpse of future functionality in an “unreleased” version of Apple’s Logic Pro:

Logic 303: Logic TNT

… although I wouldn’t be surprised to see Region Animation in a future version of FL “Fruity Loops” Studio.

Moog Music claimed to introduce a Moog guitar in a video teaser segment — that video appears to still be up. Personally, I thought this wasn’t as classic as the Moogerfooger MF-433’s “pure analog silence” — but some people did think it was real. (Hmmm… a guitar with built-in Moogerfooger effects, perhaps?) Don’t miss the MF-433 reviews, though.

Update: Okay, one slight correction on the Moog story. Did I say April Fool’s joke? That may be April Fool’s actual real product announcement. Then again, what’s real? Maybe Moog Music isn’t real, either. Ummm…

The best Moog gag of the day, though, was the Minimalmoog, as seen on Matrixsynth. I love “THE OSCILLATOR.” Ubercoolische, my friend.

Not to be outdone, Clavia introduced the Clavia Left Lead, for left-handed people.

Most amusing of all: Sweetwater’s faux vocalist plug-in, as released to CDM, was criticized for being too feasible. Yes, folks, technology has progressed to the point that readers fully expect to see a plug-in that replaces your vocalist. Well, or maybe that says something about the opinion you have of your vocalist. Point taken.

Updated: from comments, MusicRadar came up with the MusicMask, which reads facial expressions. Again, I wouldn’t be surprised if someone did something real along the same lines. (I was just fiddling with a new facial recognition library for Processing. Okay, I’ll stop…)

Thanks to Matrixsynth for being on top of all the 4/1 stuff. And yes, I will commit here and now: at some point during 2008, CDM will slip fake news into RSS on a day that isn’t April Fool’s, just to see who’s paying attention. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Updated again: This is my favorite yet: multi-sampled, multi-mic ReFill for Reason, “Reason Accordions.” Thanks to Wax in comments.

Introducing Reason Accordions – the hassle free, creativity sparking way of adding studio-grade accordion sounds to your mix. With Propellerhead Software’s ground breaking Hypersampling technique, we have captured these fine accordions in painstaking detail using state of the art equipment and instruments.

Too bad. Ernie Rideout would have been all over the Keyboard review, seriously. See, it used to be hard telling which 4/1 announcements were fake. Now it’s just hard keeping up. I think there were more product announcements yesterday (with a handful of real ones, for extra confusion) than on the first day of winter NAMM.

Then again, music tech announcements are often surreal as it is, so 4/1’s faux releases just seem like another average day.

Minimal techno pioneer, digital vinyl advocate, DJ superstar, and subject of a surrealist Internet parody and very popular joke t-shirt line Richie Hawtin is now evidently using Traktor and Traktor Scratch. So is Magda (of “make the tea” fame). So is Troy Pierce.

Gentle hint to NI’s DJ marketing: embrace it. Give us a special “Ubercoolische Edition” of Traktor Scratch. Heck, I’d buy one. I assume people in Berlin may also find it funny, given the influx of us Americans into their city. (If you have no idea what I’m talking about, read on.)

Internet memes aside, the real reason this is big news is that Hawtin was one of the DJs who threw his support behind digital vinyl with Stanton’s Final Scratch — the target market for NI with Traktor Scratch. (More recently, he used NI’s other rival — Serato Scratch Live. Thanks, Mateo.) Says Hawtin, “I find that Traktor is taking further steps forward while still remaining connected to the traditional DJ paradigm.” (Less connected to the traditional DJ paradigm, I think, are things like Ableton Live, which by its developers own admission was never originally conceived as a “DJ” program — for better or worse.) And jokes aside, I’m sure Hawtin can do some fun stuff with Traktor.

Richie Hawtin on Traktor, at Native Instruments

But I want to talk about something even more important: just as Hawtin’s label Minus Records is joining with NI for a world club tour for its 10th anniversary, the hilarious Ubercoolische site that parodies his minimalist lifestyle in Berlin is down. Happily, Google cache has preserved the white-wall apartment jokes for posterity (try a search). And you can still by the reflexive t-shirt. If anyone knows what happened to the site, let me know.

For old time’s sake, I’ve reproduced my favorite episode after the break, on Berthold Brecht. (Expletives left in for …effect.)

For the record, Magda thought it was funny, and apparently it was all in good fun because the authors of the site were fans (and actually booked the crew). You’ll know you’ve made it, too, when you’re the subject of a viral Internet parody.

Now that I’ve gotten this out of my system, next time I talk about Hawtin, Minus, or Traktor, I promise to be serious. But in the meantime:

Magda: Hey Richie, do you know that: “Because things are the way they are, they will not stay the way they are”

Richie: How do you mean Magda?

Magda: Well, Berthold Brecht said that. Does he mean that if things arent the way they were then they might be something else?

Richie: No Magda, I think he means we should use these laptops and ipods to make minimal sounds.

Ricardo: Hey Magda, Richie, whats going on?

Magda: Hey Ricardo, we’re just talking about Berthold Brecht. Do you know that he said: “Because things are the way they are, they will not stay the way they are”??

Ricardo: wow! what a minimal coincidence! I just bought you both a t-shirt with “Because things are the way they are, they will not stay the way they are” written all over it!!!

Richie: well what do you know! son of a gun – how fucking cool is it to be in Berlin?

Magda: pretty fucking cool Richie, pretty fucking cool!

I think all of this sums up the current state of digital DJing on a philosophical level, if you really reflect on it.

New rule: anyone saying anything in comments that takes this too seriously will be immediately deleted. Ironic minimal comments only.

“Finally, the name Gibson will be synonymous with fake guitars.”

Gibson Sues Over Guitar Hero

Thanks, Patrick.

And yes, Carnegie Mellon is advertising how cool they are in these videos. In these days of geek chic — and with involvement on various projects just beginning with the Keepon — I can’t really argue. (I wasn’t paid to say that, really. They didn’t give me an honorary doctorate, or, uh, a week of free tuition or something.)

There’s a side narrative with recent grad Dr. Daniel Wilson on the battle of man vs. machine, which is reasonably amusing. Here’s the Keepon bit:

And this video is totally unrelated to Create Digital Music, except that Liz and I just had to negotiate with American Airlines’ and Orbitz’s automated systems so we could talk to a human being.